Bruises on The Fruit

I have a few treats that I like to stock up on whenever I'm in Humboldt County, and among them is the vinaigrette dressing from Roy's Club in Eureka. The balance of savory and tart is just perfect for salad or crusty bread, and I feel better just knowing that I have some in the fridge. I scooped up four bottles while out on a quick shopping run, and came back quite satisfied with my loot. While taking the bag out of the car, I must have over-twisted the bag...and...see for yourself. I must warn you that the following image may not be appropriate for young foodies:

Four bottles of Roy's vinaigrette, a bottle of Mazzotti's house Italian, and a nice-looking organic peanut butter all smashed to bits, their delicious herbs and oils oozing over the pavement. In times like this I remember advice from Mark Twain: When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.

Not like this...